In Shock

I have been in shock since 2:30 pm yesterday.


It was at that time that I learned some of the most devastating news I've known in my adult life.


My friends, Matt & Molly, learned yesterday that the Supreme Court of Kansas reversed the decisions made by the two previous courts.  With that decision, their 2 year legal battle to finalize Wavy's adoption came to an abrupt and devastating end.


They will lose their 2 1/2 year old daughter.

In less than 30 days they have to give her to a family that she has never met.  Put her in a home in which she has no mother.  Hug her for the last time.  Watch her walk away.  Forever.


I can barely type the words.  The tears blur the screen.


I didn't think it would happen.  


Since I became involved in helping them last June, I have personally witnessed the thousands upon thousands of prayers that have been offered on their behalf.  I witnessed what I believed (and still do believe) to be two miracles.  (I wrote about them here and here).  


I was certain that God would show himself to be the Supreme Ruler and would use this case to bear witness to the fact that God's law always trumps Man's law.


I was convinced that through this struggle of two years, God was weaving a story that would have a happy ending.  An ending that would involve converted hearts and renewed faiths.  An ending that included many, many answered prayers.


But tonight, I am faced to ponder something I know to be true, even though I cannot even begin to fathom why the story unfolded in the way that it did...


God's plan is perfect.  His promises are true.  Good can come from immense suffering.


I don't have any more words, other than to ask for your continued prayers for this sweet family.  Please cry out on their behalf and ask God to show Himself, even amidst these heartbreaking circumstances.

Here is a part of Matt & Molly's blog post:


The bottom line is that in a couple of weeks we will lose our daughter, Wavy. There are very few, if any options left for us to change this ruling and even pursuing an appeal to the US Supreme Court will not change the fact that Wavy will be taken from us in a very short time. Right now, as you can imagine, we are in a state of shock. Although we've known all long, for 2 years, that this was a possibility it seemed less and less likely as time went on. To think that our family will go from 4 to 3 is just not something we're able to wrap our minds around. It seems so impossible. Yet, there is a growing realization that our time together is now limited. These are some of the last times we will hold her. Some of the last times we will here her say her funny phrases. Some of the last times we will hear her laugh, and cry. Some of the last times we will see her and Harper playing and laughing together...and it's starting to sink in along with the realization that our future looks very, very different then we thought it would.

There's a realization as we spend these times together as a family that we are getting ready to enter a really dark and painful place that will be dark and painful for quite some time and I feel like we are getting dragged there against our will, kicking and screaming - on the inside at least. With all of this, I still feel a sense of thankfulness. We have amazing friends and family that we know will walk through this with us. That will carry us, support us, pray for us, hold us, and make sure that we find the other side of this one day. We also do still maintain that while we don't understand why things are unfolding like this God is still sovereign and loving and will sustain us through this as well. I'm not sure how you make it through things like this without that part of yourself, that faith and knowing that He does restore and redeem even from the darkest place and injustice.

We've got quite a bit more to say about this situation, about faith, about adoption, about many things, but for now this is about all we can write. Hopefully, we're able to share more on this blog as time goes on, but we're not making any promises. There's quite an unknown ahead of us and we're not sure what the coming weeks will look like.

We know so many of you have been praying fervently for us during the last 2 years. Many of you have prayed with us and cried with us and supported is in so many ways. Right now, selfishly we would ask for your prayers once again. I have a sinking feeling that the struggle and pain of the last 2 years are going to pale in comparison to the weeks and months that lie ahead of us. So, we desperately ask for your prayers. First and foremost, please pray for our girls. This will unquestionably be the hardest on them. Without going into detail, I'm sure you can begin to imagine what it will be like for Wavy as she gets pulled from the only home she's ever known and enters a home that will be very different - most noticeably the fact that she won't have a mother - and she has an amazing one right now.  Please pray for her that her transition will be smooth, that she will be safe and that she will be loved.  There's a multitude of other prayers you can pray for her, but those are a few. Please pray for Harper. As hard as this will be for Molly and I, at least we know what's going on. I'm not sure what this will be like for a 4 year olds heart and mind. Pray that God will protect her and shield her from as much of this as possible, pray that he will give her understanding beyond her years. Pray that she will be able to express her feelings to us in ways that we can understand, and pray that she will feel safe and secure and know that she will always be with us.  Pray also that we can find some excellent counsel that will help her and help Molly and I help her. Please pray for Molly and I as well. Pray that we will cling to each other and support each other especially in the coming weeks and months. Pray that we will be good parents to Harper - that we are patient, kind, and understanding of her and pray especially hard over the next several days and weeks. I wish I could tell you I knew what the plan was and how this was all going to go down, but we know very little other than it will all happen in less than 30 days as ordered by the court. We will try keep people updated through this blog as we're able to, but please, please keep us in your prayers.