Dance to the Music

So I'm more convinced than ever that I'm on point with my resolve to "Just Be" in 2015.  Figuring that out was only the first step though.  Now I have to figure out how to make that happen.  And as I mentioned, just "being" isn't easy for a doer like myself!  

But I'm trying.  Fiercely and deliberately trying.

*****

I had a conversation with a mentor about the increasing level of chaos and sibling fighting that was occurring in my household.  It felt suffocating to me.  It was (is) often the reason I lose my cool and morph into Monster Mom.  The one my kids dislike and I detest.  My mentor suggested I make it a practice to put on music in those moments of fighting and frustration.  

Music.

I had forgotten about music.

This was a habit I used to use frequently, but had began to lose over the months and years.  As soon as she mentioned it, I knew she was right.  Music changes the mood almost instantaneously.  It immediately creates a more relaxed and fun atmosphere.  

And perhaps, most importantly, it invites DANCING!

The more often music plays in our home, the more dancing I see.  And the more opportunities there are for me to practice being present.  

That's the key.

When the kids dance, I used to have a hard time just being still in that moment.  Sure, I loved to watch their dances, but I always felt the nagging list of undone chores squelching part of the joy out of those moments.  Not by choice, but because of my problem personality. 

But since I have begun trying to be more present in my parenting, something fabulous has happened when I turn on the music.  

I see the dances differently.  
I SEE them.  Really see them.

I'm watching with more intention.  
I'm not hurrying them or begging them to finish.  

I'm storing away, into the depths of my memory, their cute faces and the graceful and the not-so-graceful and the funny  movements of their tiny bodies.  

And here's one of the best parts...
Sometimes, more than ever before, I'm dancing with them! (and pulling muscles!)

Being present and watching these littles of mine dance to the music is a great feeling.  I still feel the desire compulsion to finish my undone tasks, but when I focus on letting that nagging feeling settle, I see the things that really matter.  

Things like this.

There will be more music playing in 2015.  

Much more music.

And lots more dancing.

In the end, the music is a great distraction in times of frustration and the dancing is fun, but it's the relationships that are built and solidified through my participating in these moments have the most value.  And for that reason I will continue to encourage them to dance.