*** Note: This post was actually written several days ago, but I've been so busy "working" that I forgot to post it! ***
Yesterday was Labor Day.
And yesterday, I thanked Jesus for my husband's good job. The one that provides for our family and affords me the opportunity to stay at home raising my children. I realize that I am extremely fortunate to be able "work" on raising children while he "works" to make that possible.
So yesterday, my mind was focused on that blessing and my past jobs were far from my mind.
Today... well today is a different story!
After listening to my 2 year old scream "I want you hold me" (which translates to 'I'm tired and want out of my car seat') no less than 16,000 times on the drive across town to the eye doctor, whom I was visiting for the umpteenth time, I cowered in embarrassment as my 2 and 5 year olds fell on the ground after an all out tug-of-war ensued over whose turn it was to "play Mommy's phone". If that wasn't enough to make me think about the allure of my past "jobs", then Noah purposely pushing the eye table onto the man who was graciously (and by gracious I mean, "free of charge") attempting to adjust his glasses while glaring at me with a look of contempt as he said "if he fixes them, I'm just going to keep pushing them down on my nose so they don't fit again" all while Molly was screaming bloody murder (because she, too, hates her car seat) and Emily's chorus of "I want you hold me" carried on at full blast.... that, my friends, was more than enough to make me think about my "labors" of the past.
And so I reminisced...
In October of 1995 (in a day and age where digital cameras didn't exist and the majority of my pictures came from a man affectionately referred to as the "Party Pic Man"), I met my future husband.
We were both Seniors at the University of Kansas. We were mere months away from being released into the "real world" and well, let's just say that one of us was more ready for that than the other!
By the time I was a Senior, I had already completed two internships (one at what would become Vance's future employer), had plans to study abroad and complete my Master's degree, had a job as a Teaching Assistant to pay for my Graduate School, and had plans to take the CPA Exam.
I had a good resume, had been through the interview process many times, and had pretty much mapped out my future years and career. I was even the President of the Accounting Club (yes, I was a nerd!).
And Vance...
Well, he was busy too.
Doing a lot of this...
He played on the college golf team and for as long as he could walk, he spent almost all of his free time on the golf course! And his college summers were no different. By the time Vance was a Senior in college, he had not had a job other than one at the golf course! I remember him telling me that "playing golf" was his job!
I distinctly remember being more than shocked when he told me he did not have a resume and had not even registered with the Career Services Office! I knew the night I met him that there was a very good chance he would end up being my husband, so admittedly this news was a little unsettling to me!
While I was the more career minded of the two of us, he was the smarter. In fact, he was very smart, carrying an almost 4.0 GPA with a Business degree! So regardless of the fact that he had never had a job, I knew he had good potential!
Given his brains and my knowledge of the Career Services Office, we quickly whipped him into shape! We got him registered for the interview process, put together his resume, and started down the path of getting him his first job.
"We" were successful and we both graduated and "walked the hill" together.
I vividly remember shopping with Vance and helping him pick out his very first suit... the one he wore on his first day of his first real job with Koch Industries.
And me?
Well, I went off to Italy for a summer, then went back to KU to finish my Master's Degree in Tax Accounting. I was very dedicated to my studies and took my career plans very seriously. I distinctly remember the very spot I was standing when I opened up the envelope that held my grades from my two hardest Tax classes. In fact, I still feel a rush of energy race through my body when I look at this piece of paper...
And this one...
Meanwhile, my sweet fiance (as we eventually became engaged) was doing well in his job and was quickly promoted. His promotion came with a transfer... to the Twin Cities to work in a Sulfuric Acid Plant. Yep... that's what I thought too when I heard the news :)
So Vance moved to Minnesota and started his new career while I went on to take the CPA exam, interviewed for jobs in Minneapolis, and graduated from Graduate School just a few months before our wedding.
We got married and I moved to Minnesota to start my first official job as a Tax Consultant with PricewaterhouseCoopers. We were traditional "DINK's"... Double Income, No Kids.
After I adjusted to the outrageous traffic, I really enjoyed working in downtown Minneapolis. It was fast paced and full of new experiences. I worked in what I would describe as a somewhat "cut-throat" environment where "mandatory 60 hour" work weeks were the norm.
But I wanted to succeed and so I spent many, many hours laboring in my little cubicle on the 15th floor of the rounded bank building in the middle of the Minneapolis metropolis.
I lunched out with my colleague friends, dressed up daily, and carried a briefcase. I had important conversations and was given big responsibilities... at least I thought they were big! I sort of thrived in this little environment and enjoyed the professionalism of it all.
But Vance... his plans were beginning to change. He started to aspire for something different, something more. He started to get the itch to push his career in a different direction. Given that I had always been the more career minded of the two of us, I was secretly excited to see him aspire for bigger and better things.
One evening, we opened up an envelope that pushed our lives in yet another direction.
Vance had been accepted to the University of Texas and made the decision to pursue a Master's Degree in Business.
So after two short years, I said goodbye to my little cubicle and downtown Minneapolis.
And Vance said good riddance to his office at the Acid Plant (AND the baby blue Ford Taurus that came with it)!
And we headed south to Austin, Texas so that Vance could begin Graduate School.
Vance attended UT full time and for the next two years, he spent lots of hours working here...
And I got a new cubicle with PricewaterhouseCoopers in a new bank building on the corner of the famed 6th & Congress in Austin, Texas. I loved working in downtown Austin.
But as much as I loved my life at the time, I distinctly remember seeing what I thought were stay-at-home mom's out lunching with their friends after their yoga class at the gym. I secretly thought their life looked to be much more enjoyable than mine. After all, I had to finish my lunch and return to my little cubicle world while those toned and tan stay-home-mom's got to go on walks and shop in the fun downtown boutiques. I thought I would one day like to be a stay-home mom like them! But for the moment, I was a working woman supporting my husband.
Vance and I maintained our "DINK's" status and continued to focus on our careers. I felt a sense of pride in being able to support us financially while Vance was in school. And I did my best to excel in my career. I became involved in training and recruiting... I did just about anything and everything there was to do in my local PwC office. I worked.
A Lot.
I was (am still am) so proud of Vance when he graduated with his MBA in May of 2002.
That month and year combination probably doesn't mean much to anyone except the MBA graduates who graduated in that year... especially those that just got an MBA in Energy Finance!
A little something called the "collapse of Enron" changed our career plans once again. Vance and I both experienced some career set backs at that time and I ultimately ended up pursing another career ambition of mine... starting my own professional speaking career. I attended the Protocol School of Washington and became trained and certified as an Etiquette Consultant. You see, over the years, I watched the "older gals" in my office have babies and try to continue in their public accounting careers. It didn't seem to work very well, given the demanding hours that are inherently necessary as a Tax CPA. And so I had been investigating career ideas that would allow me to have a more flexible work life for the time that Vance and I had a family.
And so I began my Etiquette Consulting business and it was very successful. I am part of a very rare breed of people... I actually love public speaking. And I found great personal reward in helping business people and college students acquire a skill set that would enable them to further their own professional careers. And I still got to dress up and carry a brief case! I was even often on the news touting my advice about business and children's etiquette!
Eventually, Vance found his way back to Koch after having been gone for 4 years. We were blessed to end up back in Wichita and by that time, we had been blessed with the birth of Noah.
Staying home with him quickly became my desire. All of the professionalism and career plans that I had worked toward for so many years quickly became meaningless to me. I wanted only to be with him, to raise him, to teach him, to stay at home with him. I remembered what those stay-home mom's looked like in Austin.... the ones who lunched after their yoga classes! And that was the life I now wanted too!
I consider it a tremendous blessing to be able to continue to be a stay-home-mom. Vance is a hard worker and provides well for our family. I often tease him by reminding him that if he had not met me, he might still be playing golf for a living!
Both Vance and my careers look very different from what we both might have imagined back in 1995, sitting in the "Computer Center" at the Business School scouring through the different job opportunities. It took a lot of schooling, a lot of years of working in the fast paced career world, and a lot of sacrifices on the part of both Vance and me to get here, but I feel like I have finally achieved my ultimate career goal.
And it's not in a downtown metropolis or in a cubicle.
I now "work" here....
and here...
and here...
and here...
and here...
My CPA is not current, I don't carry a brief case and on most days, I don't even put on make up, let alone dress up! I lunch with little people and in my 5 year career as a stay-home-mom, I have never, ever, lunched with a friend after a relaxing yoga class! In fact, I've never even taken a yoga class! Beting a "stay-home-mom" is ,in actuality, much different, much harder than how I fantasized it would be while looking at those ladies (who suspiciously never had children with them!) in Austin. Nevertheless, I love my "job" and feel that it is the "work" that I am currently called to do.
There are days though, like today, when my mind wanders back to those days when I had what I considered to be important conversations and I walked the streets of the big city over my lunch hour... and I can't help but wander what it would be like to do it again. And maybe someday I will?
But for now, my work is here. At home.
I carry a diaper bag instead of a brief case...
My public speaking is on the topic of how to treat your sibling with respect instead of on how to properly introduce yourself...
My lunch conversations are with toddlers instead of with colleagues...
My wardrobe consists of sweatpants instead of suits...
My office resides within in my home instead of a fancy bank building...
My important conversations are about obedience and Jesus' love instead of tax planning strategies for corporations...
And my big responsibilities.... well they are much, much bigger now than any I've had in the past!
This is my job now. It didn't take an internship, a graduate degree, or a certification to get it. Yet is is the hardest, most desirable, and without a doubt, the most important one I've ever had!
Vance and I... we've been a team over the many years, working our way to where we are today. Thank you, Vance, for being such a hard worker so that I can continue my "work" here with our children! I love you for encouraging me even on days like today when I feel like throwing in the towel and going back to the city streets, the suits, and the cubicles!
Oh, and in case you were worried, Vance still gets plenty of time on the golf course! Turns out that having a good golf game is a pretty desireable skill in the business world!
(Vance wins the Koch Minerals summer golf league this summer)
